ugh I just constantly keep crying myself to sleep. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong. nothing seems to go right.

I don't think I'm smart enough to go to university. That is my honest oppinion. Its just so hard. I want to be as successful as possible. I don't want to be a failure. I don't want to be a disappointment.

I'm scared for my future. My Ideal is to settle down with someone I love, and have a family. MY OWN family. I don't know if thats even possible. My doctor was sure I had PCOS. I have my appointment tomorrow. Its my blood test results. It was tested for diabetes and PCOS, and I'm pretty sure that I'm positive for both of them. My stomach just churns at the thought of this. I just ... cant.