I hate this feeling right now.. I just called myself out. Yesterday I was otp w/ arjel at tita annadels and she said "why wasnt arjel here on saturday? .. oh wait never mind I asked that, he was sick." and she continued on and started to yell cause she knew arjel was otp with me. saying "ARJEL WHY WERENT YOU HERE ON SATURDAY, SICKNESS ISNT AN EXCUSE, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE PART OF THIS FAMILY" that felt good, knowing that my family loves him.. but when I told him that again today, I realized his family never says that.. I feel like his family doesn't give a fuck about me. I also told him I wanted to travel with him before we were married, not because of the sensual part of it, but to be with him. He didn't want to, which obviously broke my heart. Like.. I even said in like 6 years, you know.. if we're still together and I'm graduated from university. He says we would need "time" to get "money" like.. he is WEEKS away from his career. I am years away, but I have a part-time job already, saved about 300 dollars since January, but I'm going to save most of it for my trip this summer.