What is wrong with me? Why am I changing so much? Why can’t I do anything right anymore. I need to grow some balls and do what’s right for me, I’m tired of thinking about how other people feel and what might affect other people from MY decisions. Fuck this peer pressure type of fuckery. I need to grow up and stop making decisions based on other people’s happiness over mine. This is my now, not his, hers or yours; MINE.
There shouldn't be a term for "used to loving" someone. I still love him, but its just getting harder and harder. I miss the "chase" where he would drop everything just to talk to me. Where he would make everything worth it. when he tells me that I'm his only one. when it didn't matter who's listening, he's not afraid or embarrassed to tell me that he loves me, one person laughing at him wouldn't change his mind. I want you to want me. to call me because you want to hear my voice, to see me just for the sake of being with me, to kiss me because he can't help being away from me; I feel like this ALL the time, if his ringtone plays, I run to the phone and answer it right away, I try to clear my schedule for us to hang out but it never works out, when he's with me he doesn't have an urge to kiss me. I don't know if he misses me enough. Lord, please give me the strength to get through this. I know I don't need a boyfriend to be happy and that I can live without him but I don't want to. I want him in my life too much.
Peace,Love & Harmony, arjaaah♥
emotionless. Thursday, January 5, 20128:11 PM / top
I couldn't have thought of a more contradictory title. I feel so broken right now.. I feel so alone. it sucks. and I don't know what I did to deserve it. I need someone to unbreak me please.
" If there is ever a tomorrow when we are not together
there is something you must always remember;
you are braver than you believe,stronger than you seem
and smarter than you think, but most important of all, even if we are apart, I’ll always be with you."